Love is not calculating

in colleagues and friends, many advised me not to marry - the reason is he any good In addition to look able-bodied, handsome, what other obvious advantages Usually, like, no house, no savings, no car, but do not see readily available in the short term appreciation prospects, you crazy
I was not mad, I just Xiang Jiaren like crazy. Disadvantage compared with his resources, advantages of resources that I actually can not be dominant. I have high academic qualifications than he, masters graduate, but highly educated women to find her husband, the count advantage
romance does not belong to us, our wedding reception, the difference was I was not willing to recall. Live in a semi-basement in the summer as long as it rains, our family turned into swamps. I remember one day, I woke up and found all my books, or even a marriage license are all floating on the water. My house is small enough to only put a double bed and a computer table, smallest kind.
I call to her husband, only to say that I cry. He rushed home, rolled up his trouser legs to shovel the water, also said to me:
soon I left Goushi Yun - raise pay levels to make money out of the book, the days are getting light up. We bought a car, with room in the suburbs, I began to like the extravagant to spend money, but he is not used. But I spent my own money earned, he can say anything Can not, since can not only boring in the heart, Mende over time, the feelings between husband and wife on the rusty.
perception that he is unfit to me that I loss - I'm still young, and seeing the need to be more fame and fortune, one of my best-selling book charts spent 3 months , but actually there are male suitors, clamoring to be in contact with me. He is more silent, more time spent on work, it is a trivial and hard work, I play on the computer Pilipala a while, earning catch up with him on a busy few weeks.
more points and then, suddenly all the people say I'm not worthy of him - the man is all paid off, he began walking Goushi Yun, and even one day he said to me. He was prepared to go to Hong Kong, he was their company's Web site saw a recruiting overseas staff advertising, cf his own terms, and a telephone call, said that as long as this, application can be approved - working overseas year's money was more than two years, more than domestic. The only requirement is to not bring their families, and a sign at least 5 years to 8 years. Intermediate to family visit.
I was silent.
then we are all busy, he was busy he was, and I'm busy I am, and so busy that one day I reeled - I got a rare life-threatening tumor.
in my day during the treatment, he waited in the crowded hospital corridors, pretending to read a newspaper, but I saw his tears wet the newspaper already. He has six months did not work, we rely on savings and rental housing a living, both live at my mother. Fate seems to me to open a cruel joke tremendous - I lost everything instant. No man will love me like a woman, no longer young, loss of health, loss of working ability, but I want to live, I said to him: Now I know, this is not, I can not buy clothes, no makeup, do not drink coffee, but I want to live. I linger on the way forward. Whenever he and I together in the hospital corridor, I could feel the eyes - that look in addition to my compassion, but also for his sympathy, I know that people think he married me, lose out.
I asked him not feel loss, is not to just walk away He nodded. I was furious, and his eyes tears bit, I said to him, do not you marry me, marry other women, she is not sick it Even if she does not get sick, you can ensure your health does not need someone else to take care of my life Life is a need for interdependence, we can not say today I was young and pretty, you young and more money, we are well matched together, and tomorrow I have a natural and manmade disasters, or you dies, who lost out who we are, who owes who . If so, what emotional value A lot, actually the growth of people, the ups and downs, how can there be so much cheaper to do the whole let you catch up
he stared instead smiled and said: Originally I thought that I more noble, the occasion of your distress is willing to stay with you so what you said, if I do not do so, and have actually had some heaven tolerate. However, what is love If love is the most brilliant interception of a life time shot, after looking for a new and bright, and what is love
now, I was out of hospital to continue a normal life. But I often think, if not disaster, maybe he and I had s gone, because we have no reason together - and he went to Hong Kong can get double the salary, but I can also fashion magazines like As a single lady Cheng Hao and searching, to find a worthy man my identity and income. But fate is not such an arrangement, it made me realize that life is not an investment game, you never even know what kind of man is worthy of you, because you do not know the fate of the arrangements for you - it can be instantly makes you lose everything, so you do not have any bargaining position, so you do not deserve anyone, as long as the able-bodied man handsome.
I was until that moment, to pay a heavy price can not be heavy, know true love is not calculating. When someone loves you, he (she) must love your life, otherwise, it is not called love, is called the but worthless, because you smooth sailing as long as the sun at high noon, the kind of love everywhere bow available, just as if you have Jige Yi cash in the bank, all of the jewelers around the world will provide you with the best quality service. But you do not bankrupt - if you bankrupt, even the smallest of problems encountered in business, you will see the most professional of refusal, still smile at you, but will not give any service - He is up to you said: Sometimes, you must adhere to, had to endure some of the pain endured, and then you have probably experienced the joy of life and love of beauty, I really do not want you to like me so much in so great a price to pay after the and understand this.